Narrator: Having escaped the slaughter of Saruman's war band at the hands of the Crimson Rohirrim Equestrians, Pippin and Merry find themselves lost in the thick woods of Fangorn.

(suddenly, a large walking tree picks up the two hobbits and carries them deep into the forest)
Merry: Hoy, where are you taking us?!
Treebeard: Hoom-Hrum! To a meeting of my kind you might call it—an Entmoot we call it... to discuss the treachery and evil of the wizard Saruman... we go to a place some have called Derndingle—Hmmm- Hoom!
Pippin: What are you going to do with us?
Treebeard: If by that you mean to ask if I will do anything to you, the answer is no... Hrum—Hmmm—But I do not know your kind, you are not in the old lists I learned when I was young—Hoom!
Merry: We always seem to have been left out of the old stories, we call ourselves hobbits.
Pippin: Yeah, someone ought to write a book or two about us someday...

(much later at the Entmoot, the Ents of Fangorn continue their ritual assembly)
Treebeard: Hoom—Hrum! ...which brings us once again to the urgent realisation of just how much there is still left to know about. Item eleven on the agenda: the little beings called hobbits. Now, Hoom—Hrum- Quickbeam, you've had some thoughts on this?
Quickbeam: Hroom—that's right. Yeah, I've had a a good look at the two of them, and, Hroom—what I've come up with can be reduced to three fundamental concepts. First, the Rohirrim are not wearing enough hats. Second, hobbits appear to be a cross between a beardless dwarf and a ravenous groundhog. Third, matter is energy. In the universe, there are many energy fields which even we cannot normally perceive. Some energies have a spiritual source which act upon a creature's soul. However, this soul does not exist ab initio, as the Eldar once taught us. It has to be brought into existence by a process of guided self-observation. However, this is rarely achieved, owing to the unique ability of sentient creatures to be distracted from spiritual matters by everyday trivia. Hoom—Hroomph!
(pause)
Leaflock: Houmm—Hum! What was that about hats, again?
Quickbeam: Oh, Uh—Hroom! The Rohirrim aren't wearing enough. Hroom!
Treebeard: Is this, Hoom—Hruuum, true?
Quickbeam: Certainly, Hrooom! The wearing of helmets in particular has increased, but not pari passu, as—
Leaflock: But, Houmm, when you say "enough," enough for what purpose?
Skinbark: Can I just ask, with reference to your third point, Hroumph, when you say...
(much, much, much later at the Entmoot)
Leaflock: Houmm—hroom! So, Skinbark, do you think the hobbits belong on the new list or not?!
Skinbark: Hroumph! I've told you once.
Leaflock: No you haven't!
Skinbark: Yes, Hroumph, I have.
Leaflock: Hum..When?
Skinbark: Just now.
Leaflock: No you, Hoummm, didn't!
Skinbark: Yes, Hroumph, I did!
Leaflock: You didn't!
Skinbark: I did!
Leaflock: You, Hoummm, didn't!
Skinbark: I'm telling you, Hroumph, I did!
Leaflock: You did not, Houmm—hum—
(much, much, much, much, MUCH later at the Entmoot)
Treebeard: Hoom- Hrum! The matters before the Entmoot are decided then.
Merry: Excellent! Then you will help us?
Treebeard: Ummm—hrum—hooom! Well, no. We have decided not to do a ruddy damn thing- Hoom- Hrum! But I will give you a one-way ride out of our forest in whatever direction you wish to go—hrum!
Merry: Please take us by Isengard then. I want to see where all that smoke over there is coming from.
Treebeard: Hrooom, as you wish!
Pippin: Wow. The ents not willing to help fight evil... this is certainly a surprise. I guess we now know why they called this "ent" meeting "moot" eh?!
Merry: Yeah, I just wouldn't have expected this...