So she stayed and the seven dwarves kept the house in tip top order, and in the morning they all trooped off to the city to work for the BBC, and in the evening they came home again and cooked Snow White a slap-up three course dinner. Then they all climbed into the big double bed together and had lots of hot, steamy sex. Well, the dwarves had lots of hot sex, Snow White got steamy in the shower with her rabbit. Oh, allright, she sometimes had sex with one of them, well several of them—allegedly. Oh, bugger it, who am I kidding? She was a dirty little slut, who simply couldn't keep her legs together and was never happier than when three dwarves were going down on her, two were giving her a cream facial and Wodger—sorry, Roger, was taking her roughly from behind. Happy now? Oh, you want to know why I missed out Ralph, do you? Will you'll just have to wait, won't you? Anyway, all day long she was alone with only her wabbit—sorry, rabbit, for company and the kindly dwarves warned her, saying: "Watch out for your evil stepmother. If she finds out you're shacked up with us you're dead meat. Don't let anyone in." Obvious stuff really. Not that it did an impulsive and clueless girl like Snow White a blind bit of good, as we shall see.

After eating what she thought was Snow White's tits and pussy, the evil Tart felt sure she was once again the hottest babe in all the land. So she picked up her magic mobilee and keyed in:
"Mobile, mobile, in my hand
who's the hottest babe in all the land?"
And the mobile answered:
"You're the hottest babe here, Oh Mistress, but—"
"—But what?" interrupted the starlet.
"Er..Snow White who's hanging out with seven randy midgets far away is a thousand times hotter than you, you washed-up old junkie fag-hag."
"WHAT?!! What did you say? Are you telling me that bitch is still alive?"
"In a nutshell, yes. And she makes you look like an ageing slapper who's been cobbled together from silicone implants left over from bad boob jobs."
"Haven't we had this conversation before?" shrieked the Tart.
"We might have.."
"Where is the bitch? I'll fucking kill her!"
"Living with seven midgets in the forest like I told you, you stupid slag."
"I'll kill that double-crossing, lying scumbag!" the Tart yelled, and flung the mobile across the room.

She gasped and turned pale. She knew the mobile didn't lie, unlike the scumbucketing TV presenter who'd deceived her. Snow White was still alive! She racked her brains for a way to kill the stuck-up little princess, for she simply had to be the hottest in the land, or her tits would explode again. At last she thought up a plan so cunning even the really cunning bugger who'd dreamed up a fiendishly cunning way to persuade millions of women they had a 'G-spot', would be gobsmacked by her brilliance.

She disguised herself to look like Ann Summers and dressed like an old tart (well, an older tart anyway) so that even her own gynaecologist wouldn't recognise her. In this cunning disguise she made her way through the forest to the house of the seven dwarves, knocked at the door and cried out: "Pretty thongs for sale! Pretty vibrating thongs with pink bunny rabbits on them for sale!"
Snow White looked out of the window and said: "Gosh you're ugly aren't you? Is your bum always that big or is it that howwibly unfashionable micwosquirt you're wearwing?"

"Pretty vibrating thongs for sale!" repeated the old bag.
"Did you say pwetty VIBWATING thongs?" asked Snow White excitedly.
"Yes, nice pretty thongs to tickle your fancy, my pretty!" cackled the old crone. "Lots of different speeds," and with that she whipped out a pair of pale, yellow thongs which trembled invitingly in her hands."
"Wow!" gushed Snow White, and completely forgetting her promise to the dwarves, rushed to unlock the door and let the woman in. No sooner had she done so than the woman lifted up Snow White's dress and clicked her tongue disapprovingly. "Child!" exclaimed the painted floozie sweetly, "You look such a fright in those awful panties. Come, slip them off and let me try these on you." Suspecting nothing, Snow White stepped out of her panties and let the woman dress her in the pretty, yellow thong.
"Ohh," sighed Snow White, and wriggled her hips as a delicious tingle shot through her pussy and down her thighs. "Can it go any faster?"
The woman laughed and pulled the thong tighter.
"Ohh I'm so wandy.." moaned Snow White, sinking into the woman's arms. "faster!"
The Evil Tart cackled in triumph and pulled viciously up on the thong just as Snow White let out a long, shuddering moan. The girl's pretty blue eyes rolled up into her head and she collapsed onto the floor and lay as though dead.
"Well, well," chuckled the evil old Tart, "Not so hot now, are we, my pwetty?" And with that she gave Snow White a vicious kick in the crotch and hurried away, laughing evilly.

At nightfall, the seven dwarves came home and saw their beloved Snow White lying on the floor with her dress pushed up around her waist and her long legs wide apart. Surprise sson turned to lust, which quickly turned to shock, which turned to horror as they realised she was dead! They lifted her up, and when they saw how tightly the thong had been pulled, cut it off. Her pretty eyes fluttered open and she let out a long sigh, and then little by little she came back to life. When the dwarves heard what had happened, they said: "That old sex toy demonstrator was your wicked stepmother in disguise. You must be more careful and never let anyone in when we're away."
"OK, Walph, I'll twy."
"It's Robert, actually," said Robert. "Any chance of a quickie before bedtime?"
"Sowwy. I pwomised Woss and Wodney I'd let them wodger me for cooking such a scwummy bweakfast this morwing."

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